The Unexpected Gift

One of the things I love most is helping people.  I don’t mean the “helping people” I do through my work (although I absolutely LOVE that too) but I am referring to all the “other” things I do beyond my business. For years I have LOVED doing things anonymously.  I truly believe the gift is in the giving, not in the recognition of the giving.

Recently I had an opportunity to help someone out.  I am not going to go into all the details (as I said it is the giving that is important).  It wasn’t someone who I was close to nor did I feel I was under any obligation to help them.  Assisting this person did created some minor inconveniences for me, which weren’t a big deal.  It did, however,  lead several people, who knew what I was doing, to ask, “Why are you helping this person you hardly know?  Don’t you have enough  on your plate?” The “why” was very easy to answer.  If I found myself in the predicament the person I helped was in, I would hope to God someone would help me.  And lets face it, I am always crazy busy (and I love that too)!

For years I have talked about compassion.  I have encouraged people to try to make a conscious effort to put themselves in other peoples shoes.  This is something I really do try to everyday.  And yes I agree it isn’t always easy!  What if this was me?  What would I need? How would I want to be treated?  These are all questions I try to ask myself.  I know it seems so simple but it can really change your life, your interactions with others and your relationships!  So when I was asked if I could help this person out, I did so without hesitation.  When I imagined myself in this person place I found myself overcome by how horrible their situation was.  In fact I found myself feeling so bad for what the person was going through that I wasn’t even paying attention to the amazing gift I was about to receive.

Let’s face it, helping people is not always easy! You aren’t always appreciated.  Even worst there are times when you try to help someone and not only do they NOT appreciate it but then they get mad at you for trying to help them! Boy if I had a dollar for every time that has happened throughout my life. Honestly it makes you want to just stop helping people!  Those of us who are super empathetic have a really hard time with this. Sometimes we are so caught up in how bad the person is “feeling” and how horrible what they are going through is that we don’t even realize that maybe they really don’t want to change. Then there are those who do what I believe therapist call transference.  You know when someone takes all their problems, aggravation, hurt and they blame or put it all on you.  Sound familiar?  For me 2017 seem to be filled with an awful lot of that. If I am being totally honest, I was really hesitant to help anyone anymore. In fact, I had made a conscious decision in Oct that moving forward I was going to be very particular about who I helped.  I set a boundary that I only wanted to attract people who valued and appreciated my help.  Then this person came along!

I so do believe that everything happens for a reason.  This person coming into my life and them needed assistance when they did could not have been more divinely orchestrated.  I am so glad I  jumped into to help without hesitation! And let me just say, OMG were they ever appreciative!  I can not even begin to tell you in words how they took every opportunity possible to remind me how appreciative they were.  The funny thing is it wasn’t until all was said and done that I realized it was me who received the gift!  The gift of appreciation!  They confirmed and validated that by setting my boundary in Oct I had indeed shifted the energy and was now only attracting those who valued and appreciated my help! I can not even tell you what a wonderful experience it all was!  What a wonderful way to end what was definitely a year of tests!

As I said I am not going to mention the person or the situation. I only hope they do read this and they realize what a wonderful gift they have given me!  They have restored my faith in humanity after a year of dealing with some VERY unappreciative people.  They have reminded me that life is all about balance!  Not everyone is going to be appreciative and that is okay.  However, we do NOT have to help those who in turn treat us poorly!  We get to choose who, when and where we offer our help!  We get to say my help is valuable and is to be appreciated!  So thank you beautiful soul for all the wonderful light and insight you brought to me!

 

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