(910) 444-2229

Today was day two of taking my gardens back.  I am ashamed to say that I have totally neglected them this year and the front of my house was looking like an abandoned home!  Now let me just tell you these were not those cute little weeds that you could just lean over and slip out of the dirt.  No, these were those horrific grass looking weeds.  You know the ones that  you need to dig out with a shovel, properly position your body for balance and yank out of the ground with all of your might.  Did I mention it was over 90 degrees today, my arms were killing me from the 1/2 hour swimming competition I stupidly challenged my 16 year old daughter to the day before and I was still achy from the 4 hours of shrub trimming I also did the day before.

I have to tell you I was getting extremely frustrated and honestly was about to give up.  For some reason (maybe because I am insane and always looking for the “lesson” in my experiences)  I started to pay attention to the way I was working through the garden.  I wasn’t looking at the entire garden that needed to be done because that was just too damn overwhelming.  Instead I was sitting barefoot in the grass only focusing on the section that was right in front of me.  Little by little I worked my way around the garden never focusing on how much I had left.  I only focused on what I had done and how beautiful it looked.

Just for the record I am a get down in the dirt, gloves off, no shoes, play in the mud girl!  One of my favorite thing to do as a child was to make mud pies.  Shocking I know!  As I was weeding I was thinking about how awesome it feels to have your hands in the dirt.  Then I thought, “You know, grabbing a hold of these weeds and yanking them out of the ground feels pretty good too”!  With each weed I pulled I started to think about a different  situation/person that had been causing me stress of late.  I started to focus on the struggle it took to get that darn weed out and then the absolute relief I felt when it was finally gone!  I noticed how I paid extra close attention to the roots because lets face it, if you don’t get those suckers out those weeds will be back by morning. That is when it hit me!

Weeding is a great metaphor for life.  Sometimes “weeds” take over our lives.  Sometimes we are so busy with other things that we just don’t feel we have the strength to deal with them.  When we do finally make the time to deal with them it takes a lot of effort to get them out but in the end it is well worth it.  Once the weeds are gone we have more space in our garden to bring in beautiful flowers.  Those flowers then bring us great joy and beauty!  Still not following?  Let me break it down for you non-gardeners.

Weeds are like the toxic situations/people in our lives.  They tend to creep in slowly and before we realize it they take all of our energy and focus.  Many of us tend to ignore them until they overtake us.  It can be a big struggle to get them out of our lives.   But we can not make room for the healthy experiences/relationships if we are always surrounded by unhealthy and toxic ones!  Yes, it can be overwhelming to fix everything in our lives at one time but much easier when you break it down one situation/person at a time.  What is even more amazing is the fact that as you start to rid yourself of the toxic situations/people you in your life you then open yourself up to wonderful, caring, healthy and rewarding experiences and/or relationships.

As I was pondering all of this I couldn’t help but think about the cycle of the garden itself and how that directly applies to our lives as well.   Any gardener will tell you that you just don’t plant your garden and it is good to go forever.  Each year you need to pull the weeds and prepare the ground, then you plant and THEN you reap the reward of the beautiful flowers.  You have to do this continually if you want to keep that beautiful garden.   But how many of us live our lives like the gardener?  How many of us constantly tend to our own lives?  How many of us are always on the look out for those weeds?

There is only one thing that is constant in life and that is change.  We are always changing, growing and learning.  We need to continually be on the look out for weeds (toxic situations and people) that may be invading our garden!  We need to be strong (courageous) enough to pull (toss) them out.   It isn’t always easy.   It can be a time consuming sweaty job.  However if you just focus on one section (situation/person) at a time before you know it your life will be like a garden …. filled with beauty and happiness!

So that is my story and the lesson I learned about the wonders of weeding!   My garden now looks great.  The stress I released was incredible and I got a tan!

PS….. Just in case you were wondering, I lost the 1/2 hour swimming competition to my daughter.  I am 43 and she is a certified life guard…what the heck was I thinking!

Oh and one final gardening tip.  It is really wonderful to picture each weed you pull as a situation/person that is causing you stress!  Happy Weeding!