(910) 444-2229

I remember back in the day when I first started in business.  I was working 7 days a week and working crazy hours.  I had no time to myself or my family and way too often I worked myself until I was exhausted and sick.  Why?  Because I was afraid to say, “No I can not see you at that time”.  Now at first I thought that was just me being a great business person.  As time went on I found myself sick and miserable more and more often.  Then I began asking a different question, “Why can’t I say no”?  The answer….I don’t want anyone to be mad at me.  That seemed reasonable but then I dug deeper. I realized the truth of the matter was I didn’t want anyone to not like me.  BINGO! I was onto something!

After years and years of doing thousands of readings it starting hitting me that deep down inside we all have the same fears. One of the biggest ones  is the fear of not being liked.  It starts when we are very young and in school and we want to be in with the “cool” kids.  Then we start dating and we are devastated when someone breaks up with us (how can they NOT like us).  As we become adults it seeps into our jobs and on and on and on. Somewhere along the way (without us even realizing it) we start living our lives based solely on the purpose of having others “like us”.  We stop saying what we feel as we don’t want anyone to get mad and not like us.  We start changing who we are so other will like us.  We stay at jobs we hate and in relationships that aren’t good for us cause what would others think if we left.  Our lives no longer become about who we are.  Our lives become all about living to be liked!

Recently I saw one of the most awesome things ever. It was a video of a bunch of very famous people (actors, comedians, etc) reading tweets they had received from people who CLEARLY did not like them. I have to tell you some of them were absolutely horrible!  I honestly don’t know what people were thinking when they sent them or why they felt the need to attack someone they didn’t even know (but that is a blog for another time).  I realized as I was listening to all of these famous people that it doesn’t matter who you are, what you do, how wonderful of a person you truly are or how successful you become… there will always be people who don’t like you.

The truth is….it is not mathematically possible that everyone you meet will like you.  Maybe you remind them of someone they hated in high school, or your hair is the color of their ex, or maybe your views remind them of the boss that gave them a hard time, or you have something they wish they had or you are doing something they wish they could do  The truth is we are all just mirrors reflecting things to one another.  Some reflections are things we like and some are not.  It is really that simple.

For many years  I held myself back. I was terrified to do radio or TV or to really put myself out there as I was afraid of not being liked. Once I truly understood that “not being liked” is not only a part of life but it is okay I was able to truly step into who I was.  Of course, I too have those who feel the need to share their not so nice views about who I am and what I do for a living.  Ya know what, it doesn’t effect me!  I completely respect peoples right to have their opinion as I have the right to have mine.  At the end of the day it is just that…their opinion.  The only opinion that truly matters is the opinion you have of yourself. Your life is yours to live.  You can believe whatever you wish, you can be whomever you wish to be and you do deserve to be your true authentic self!

So let’s wrap this up in three quick tips..shall we:

 

  1. It is not mathmatically possible that every person you will meet in your life will like you
  2. Everyone is allowed to have their own opinion of who you are or how they view you
  3. The only opinion you should be focusing on is yours

And one last thought….when you are tormenting yourself over someone who doesn’t like you and trying to figure out why ask yourself this questions instead: “Is this person someone I admire and wish to be like”?

Now get off this computer and go do great things for yourself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Why?  Because you are frigen awesome!